We all want to be that person who brushes off criticism, ignores rude comments, and floats through life like an unbothered Zen master.
But then someone throws shade, and suddenly we’re spiraling, obsessing over what we did wrong. So, how do you stop taking things so damn personally?
Here are seven practical, no-BS ways to chill out, reclaim your sanity, and laugh off the small stuff.
1. You’re Not Your Mistakes, So Stop Acting Like It
Here’s the truth: no one is sitting around replaying your embarrassing moments like it’s a highlight reel. We all screw up. Like that time I tripped in front of my boss on my first day, good times.
But guess what? You’re not defined by that one awkward moment (or a hundred). Your mistakes don’t equal your worth. So, next time you mess up and feel like crawling under a rock, just remind yourself, “Well, at least I’m not boring.” You’re human, and that’s pretty badass.
2. Your Self-Worth is None of Their Business
Let’s get something straight—your self-worth? Totally your business. Not your friend’s, not your coworker’s, and certainly not that random person who made a snide comment.
I used to let my confidence hinge on what other people thought of me. Then I realized—wait a second—I’m the one driving this bus.
Handing over control of your self-esteem is like giving someone else your Netflix password and expecting them not to mess up your algorithm. Nope. You’re the only one who gets to decide how awesome you are. Own it.
3. Other People’s Rudeness is Just Their Emotional Vomit
I once had a customer at work who was so rude, I thought I must’ve accidentally set their house on fire. Turns out, they just had a bad day.
People are rude because they’re dealing with their issues, not because of anything you did. It’s like emotional vomit—they’re just spewing out whatever internal mess is going on inside them.
So next time someone snaps at you, just imagine them trying to handle their emotional chaos and move on. They’re not your problem.
4. Constructive Criticism is a Free Upgrade, So Say Thanks!
When someone criticizes me, my first reaction is usually something like, “What did I ever do to you, Karen?” But then I stop and think—wait, could this be useful?
Constructive criticism is like a free upgrade to the latest version of yourself. Sure, it stings a bit, but after the sting comes growth. If there’s truth in the criticism, take it. If not, let it bounce off you like bad Wi-Fi.
Either way, it’s not about you personally. It’s about how you can become even better.
5. Not Everything is About You, Toxic People Have Their Own Drama
People’s actions aren’t always about you. Shocking, I know. Like that time I thought a friend was ignoring me because they secretly hated me? Nope—they were just stressed about work.
We all have a bad habit of thinking we’re the center of the universe (myself included). But maybe the person who didn’t text back is just busy or forgot. Maybe they didn’t say “hello” because they’re shy. Maybe the world doesn’t revolve around your every interaction—crazy, right?
6. You’re Not Everyone’s Cup of Tea, So Be Proud Of Your Sh*T
This is a big one. Somewhere along the way, we get it into our heads that we need to please everyone. But here’s the kicker: you can’t. It’s impossible. Even Beyoncé has haters (wild, I know).
You can do everything right and someone will still find a reason to criticize you. It’s like trying to please everyone at a family dinner—you’re always going to have that one person who hates the mashed potatoes.
Instead of trying to win over everyone, focus on the people who actually matter—and that includes you.
7. Step Outside Yourself and Get Some Fresh Perspective
When you’re in the thick of it, it’s easy to think the world is crashing down around you. But, take a step back for a second. Imagine an outsider looking at your situation—what would they say? Probably something like, “It’s not that deep.”
When I’m all up in my feelings, I ask myself, “Would future me care about this?” Nine times out of ten, the answer is no. Seeing things from an outsider’s perspective helps you realize that what feels like a big deal is just a small bump in the road.
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